"You Spin Me Round" is the first mission of Season 5.
The time has come to take Abel back from The Minister, but getting past your own defences will take practice.
Cast[]
Plot[]
Runner Five Is Dead[]
The mission to take back Abel has begun. The Minister's taken the bait, you've slipped past her defences, and everything's going to plan - until you're shot to death by soldiers.
They've Killed Janine![]
The mission to take back Abel has begun. You make it inside, but won't get to the armoury without Janine fighting off the guards. Turns out there's too many for one person. With Janine dead the mission's aborted.
Back To Starting Positions[]
The mission to take back Abel has begun. Inside the township walls you and Janine opt for stealth and cunning to take out the guards, but Janine's forgotten the armoury alarm and you're both killed.
Back To The Start, Again[]
Sam wants to take a break from these 'war games' but Janine feels close to a solution. This time the plan involves hang-gliding in, which would work apart from the anti-aircraft guns that can shoot you down.
Past The Grey Buildings[]
Going through the motions of the plan again you make it inside Abel and the Minister escapes in her convoy. Janine deals with the guards while you grab Abel's 'non-compliant' residents.
Stick Close To The Buildings[]
This plan seems to work better; neither you or Janine are dead yet. The 'non-compliant' residents have to be sprung from a newly built prison, but the escape route takes you through kindergarten. Sam decides you can't risk the children and improvises.
Semiautomatic Weaponry[]
Sam's improvised plan may involve some casualties, but there's strength in numbers and your freed prisoners can take on the guards by the armoury.
Take Point[]
Armoury guards dispatched, you can now use the weapons to get to the township command centre and re-take Abel.
Have To Go Tonight[]
In the command centre you find Ian Golightly, who may or may not help you stand down the guards. Either way, Janine's happy with this plan, and you're out of time. You'll take back Abel tonight.
S05E01 // Rofflenet[]
Discussion regarding this mission can be found on Rofflenet
Transcript []
[flashback lines mixed with dialogue from present time]
MAXINE MYERS: Janine, Sigrid’s taken your home! Sam, she has your child! Five, Sigrid was the one who shot your helicopter down. She has taken Abel, but we’re breaking in. We are rescuing our people! We are taking our home back!
[foliage rustles]
GUARD: Over there. Something moved.
[gunshots]
SAM YAO: You’ve got to keep moving, Five. You’re our last hope.
MAXINE MYERS: If they want something, we thwart them. If they do something, we stand against it!
GUARD: Someone’s got inside the wire. It’s one of them, an Abel runner.
[gunshots, alarm blares]
JANINE DE LUCA: It’s just like we planned, Five. They’re following my emergency plan to the letter. They’ll close the gates now, and the noise will give you your opportunity.
MAXINE MYERS: If they’ve won, then we’re all that’s left, and we fight because that’s who we are.
GUARD: Close the gates. There’s an intruder.
[gate siren, gates lowering]
JANINE DE LUCA: Now, Runner Five!
GUARD: Stop!
JANINE DE LUCA: Detonate the explosives.
[device beeps, explosion, GUARD shouts]
JANINE DE LUCA: That’s it. The door’s blown. You’re through the armoury perimeter wall.
SAM YAO: Now, stay close to the wall, Five. The searchlights won’t quite reach you.
JANINE DE LUCA: Sigrid’s sending her armored vehicles out now, Five. She’s taken the bait. She thinks the danger’s coming from outside the gates.
SAM YAO: She’s sending more guards to run the perimeter, Janine. Runner Five needs to move, now!
[explosion, GUARD shouts]
JANINE DE LUCA: No! Mister Sissay’s detonated a smoke grenade.
SAM YAO: Steve, always with the bombs.
JANINE DE LUCA: Five, you have to wait until the guards have moved from the entrance to the armoury. We can’t do anything without weapons.
GUARD: Come on, come on! You go around this way, I’ll go around that way. We’ll cut them off.
SAM YAO: Okay. Okay. Move now, Five! The guards are moving off toward the grenade. Now! Run, now! Keep going, Five. We’ve practiced this. If you can make it to the armoury entrance before the guards spot you -
GUARD: There! Someone’s there!
GUARD: Stop, now!
[gunshots]
MAXINE MYERS: Runner Five, she and her proxies have tried to kill you again and again.
SAM YAO: Run! Five, run! [gunshots] Oh God.
JANINE DE LUCA: Runner Five, keep going!
SAM YAO: No, Janine.
JANINE DE LUCA: Runner Five, copy. Are you in the armoury?
SAM YAO: Janine, stop! Stop. It’s over. Runner Five is dead.
MOONCHILD: Oh… I’m dying…
[audio rewinds; proceeds as flashback lines mixed with dialogue from present time]
MAXINE MYERS: We fight because that’s who we are.
[gunshots]
GUARD: Close the gates, there’s an intruder.
[gate siren, gates lowering]
JANINE DE LUCA: Now, Runner Five.
GUARD: Stop!
JANINE DE LUCA: Detonate the explosive.
[device beeps, explosion, GUARD shouts]
JANINE DE LUCA: That’s it. The door’s blown. You’re through the armoury perimeter wall. We’re changing our plan. I’m with you now. You head west. I’ll head east, around the outside.
SAM YAO: Okay, good. Sigrid’s sending our her armored vehicles on time.
JANINE DE LUCA: We’re going to cut off the guards from the armoury, Five.
GUARD: Watch out, watch out!
[explosion, GUARD shouts]
SAM YAO: Right. Steve The Builder’s detonated his smoke grenade. The guards are –
GUARD: You go around this way, I’ll go around that way, we’ll cut them off.
SAM YAO: - yup, the guards are moving off now, towards the smoke.
JANINE DE LUCA: We don’t have time to get into the armoury before they spot us. Five, keep moving. I’ll wait here.
SAM YAO: But Janine. Janine, what? What are you doing?
JANINE DE LUCA: Runner Five, keep moving. We are taking Abel back no matter what happens!
GUARD: There. There, someone’s there!
JANINE DE LUCA: Just keep going. I’ll take them. [attacks GUARDS] I’ve taken three of them. Throats slit. They weren’t expecting me.
SAM YAO: No, no, there are too many, Janine. You have to move!
JANINE DE LUCA: No, I can keep them occupied while Five gets the weapons to arm the rebels.
SAM YAO: No, no, there are too many, Janine. You have to move!
JANINE DE LUCA: I’m fine! I’m – [screams]
SAM YAO: Janine? Report! Report!
JANINE DE LUCA: Five, keep going!
[gunshot]
SAM YAO: Janine? Oh. Oh God, Five. They’ve killed Janine. We have to abort the mission. Run! Run! Run for your life!
[audio rewinds; proceeds as flashback lines mixed with dialogue from present time]
MAXINE MYERS: We fight, because – [audio rewinds] We fight, because – [audio rewinds] We fight, because that’s all we’ve got!
GUARD: Close the gates, there’s an intruder.
[gate siren, gates lowering]
JANINE DE LUCA: Runner Five, I will detonate the explosive.
[device beeps, explosion, GUARD shouts]
SAM YAO: Okay, you’re through the armoury perimeter wall.
JANINE DE LUCA: Runner Five, you go east. I’m waiting here. There are ten guards. I’m going to set up trip wires to the south and west to slow them down.
SAM YAO: Sigrid’s sending out her armoured vehicles.
JANINE DE LUCA: Go, Five! Into the armoury. Get the weapons, arm the rebels.
GUARD: Watch out, watch out!
[explosion, GUARD shouts]
SAM YAO: Smoke grenades detonated.
GUARD: You go round this way, I’ll go around that way. We’ll cut them off.
SAM YAO: The guards are heading for you now, Janine. All ten guards. Coming right for you.
JANINE DE LUCA: First trip wire is in position. I’m setting up the second. [GUARDS shout] That is two – [attacks GUARD] Correction: three down. I’m not even out of breath, Mister Yao.
SAM YAO: Right. Okay. Janine’s got this. Five, you’re at the door to the armoury. If we’re right – [door opens] Yes. No guards left inside. Okay, you’ve got to be quick. Assault rifles, we need a dozen. And grab some of those grenades. Our people should be waiting at the gap in the wall, just keep moving, get out of there, and -
[alarm blares]
MAXINE MYERS: A siren goes off.
SAM YAO: Janine, what’s that siren?
JANINE DE LUCA: Just a moment. [attacks GUARD] Damn it. She’s using my own defense plan, Delta Alpha. Of course. The alarm is set to sound if anyone tries to remove more than two weapons at the same time.
GUARD: There, I see them! Turn the searchlight.
[gunshots]
SAM YAO: You’re both dead, Janine. They’ve killed you both this time.
JANINE DE LUCA: Delta Alpha’s almost foolproof.
SAM YAO: Any weaknesses?
JANINE DE LUCA: The only weakness in Delta Alpha was air assault. Right! Five, Doctor, Mister Yao? Back to starting positions. Quickly. Run!
SAM YAO: Right. You’re high up on those hills about three miles away from Abel.
MAXINE MYERS: Shouldn’t we take a break, Janine? I’m as keen as anyone to crack this, but we’ve been at this for hours, and we’re losing focus. Just a ten minute break.
JANINE DE LUCA: We’re about to solve the problem, Doctor. Both of you, just work through the notes from Mister Sissay as you always do. There’s no better way to test a strategy than to work it through.
SAM YAO: Fine! Right, yes. [sighs] You’re high up on the hills above Abel. You’ve got your hang gliders. Five and Janine, take a run off the hill. [wind blows] Wow. Yeah, that is pretty impressive. You’ve got a view over the whole of the township. You can see everything. Okay, where are you heading?
JANINE DE LUCA: Delta Alpha has a tactical weakness to the southwest corner of the township, Five. If we wheel left now, we’ll come in via a blind spot in the turrets.
SAM YAO: Okay. You’re losing altitude, but you should be safe to land. Right, Maxine. Got the tactical plan of Abel? Wait a minute. Sigrid’s got busy putting new stuff in, hasn’t she?
MAXINE MYERS: Okay, yeah. Uh, okay. Yeah, I’m the guards, and I’m looking around. [imitates GUARD] I’m a guard, and I can’t see anything to the southwest. But wait, I’m a different guard, and I’m positioned facing out on the southwest. I see them, there!
[gunshots]
SAM YAO: Yeah, they’re firing at you, Janine! There are...anti-aircraft guns, it says here.
JANINE DE LUCA: Sigrid must have gone over Delta Alpha very thoroughly. Oh, bugger. No, I remember now. I fixed it.
MAXINE MYERS: Five, you and Janine have both been riddled with bullets, and you never even hit the ground. [sighs] This is getting us nowhere.
SAM YAO: Oh, come on, now! We’ve worked out some stuff that definitely won’t work, and that’s worth knowing. Janine, important question: what didn’t you foresee?
JANINE DE LUCA: How would I possibly know that, Mister Yao? [huffs] Back to starting positions. Quick as you can!
[gunshots, gate siren, gates raising]
MAXINE MYERS: Okay, you’re heading in. You can do it, Five! You can do it, Janine!
JANINE DE LUCA: Yes, we know. [device beeps, explosion, GUARD shouts] I’m through the perimeter wall outside the armoury.
SAM YAO: Sigrid’s sending her armoured vehicles out. I say Sigrid. The notes actually say she’s not in residence right now.
JANINE DE LUCA: She’s taken most of her personal guard with her. This is why it’s our best moment to attack.
GUARD: Watch out, watch out!
[explosion, GUARD shouts]
MAXINE MYERS: Okay. Steve’s set off his smoke grenade. [imitates GUARD] Oi! Who’s that over there?
JANINE DE LUCA: Runner Five, you have to be quick. I’m going to hold the guards here, get rid of as many as I can, and you have to go now and free the rebels. Mister Sissay has accessed the Minister’s security files. She has red-flagged those who are not compliant. Those people will help us. Lead them back here to get their own weapons. You can only take out two each. It’s the only way.
There’s almost no one we can trust. The Minister has released all of the documents we found, but doctored them so that it looks like I created the zombie virus. But these rebels are loyal to us.
SAM YAO: Abel’s changed, Five. It’s not going to be how you remember it. But I’ll guide you around. Head west, past the gray buildings. Go, now.
SAM YAO: Right. I don’t want to jinx it, but this is going better. Five, our people should be chained up in that building to the right. Now, that’s new in the past couple of weeks. Of course, the first thing she’d build would be a prison. Uh, just break the door down. [door breaks down] And quite a few of us should be in there. There’ll be… Jody.
MAXINE MYERS: [imitates JODY MARSH] Hey, I’m little, but I’m scrappy, and we’re all going to die!
SAM YAO: [laughs] Yeah. Right, okay. Also, Runner Thirteen, Cameo. [imitates CAMEO WOOD] Yeah, well, I’m kind of too cool for school, but I got a heart of gold! How can I help?
MAXINE MYERS: What was that? You didn’t even sound like her. Okay, who else? Kytan. Oh, I love Kytan! We need to get him out. [imitates KYTAN] And uh, I’m going to do like a ninja kick. Wah!
SAM YAO: Oh yeah, oh yeah! And uh, and Owen. Oh yeah. [imitates OWEN LANDIS] G'day, mate! Uh, g'day cobber. [laughs]
JANINE DE LUCA: Is this quite necessary? I’m fighting for my life, here.
MAXINE MYERS: We’ve gone hysterical with the stress, Janine. [laughs] Okay, focus. Five, you’ve got your team. They’re all free. Head back to the armoury.
SAM YAO: Now, you’ve still got a few minutes before the armoured vehicles find out that our explosions are just grenades and land mines, not an army in the woods.
JANINE DE LUCA: Take the back route to the armoury. We can’t let you be spotted.
SAM YAO: Oh, the back route’s going to take you through the kindergarten, though. Oh! Oh, you could pick up Paula and baby Sara there! Or maybe after the gun battle’s over.
JANINE DE LUCA: No, no, that’s alright. At the first sign of trouble, my plan instructs the guards to evacuate the kindergarten.
MAXINE MYERS: Sigrid’s plan doesn’t say that. We can’t take our team through there, it’d put the kids at risk.
SAM YAO: Okay, okay. Now, we’ve got this far. I’m going to improvise.
JANINE DE LUCA: That’s not what we agreed, Mister Yao.
SAM YAO: Sometimes, it’s the only way. Five, take your team, lead them anticlockwise around the base. Stick close to the buildings, and run. You’ve got to be quick.
SAM YAO: Okay, you’re going well.
MAXINE MYERS: [imitates OWEN LANDIS] One of the soldiers has got me, cobber! I’m a goner!
SAM YAO: Damn it. Well, we’ll come back for you, Owen. Might just be a flesh wound. If I had my Demons and Darkness tables, I could roll for damage. I’ll bet Sigrid’s thrown out my Demons and Darkness tables. Five, you’re nearly at the entrance to the armoury.
JANINE DE LUCA: There are four guards left. They spotted my tactics, and deployed countermeasures. [explosion] They do have an armoury, but now, we outnumber them. Jody, Kytan, with me. Cameo, with Five. We’ll flank them and take them down, and once we have back my semiautomatic weaponry from the armoury, we’ll be unstoppable. Move!
[GUARD collapses]
SAM YAO: [imitates JODY MARSH] Boss! That’s the last of the soldiers guarding the armory down!
MAXINE MYERS: [imitates CAMEO WOOD] Grab the weapons. But just two each, remember.
JANINE DE LUCA: Do we have to do the accents?
SAM YAO: I… I uh, think it lends verisimilitude.
MAXINE MYERS: It keeps our energy up. [imitates KYTAN] Yah! Ninja kick!
JANINE DE LUCA: We have our weapons now, and a team of five. That’s enough. We’re heading to the command center at the double. We’re taking Abel back! Runner Five, you take point. It won’t be long until their backup forces arrive. Run!
GUARD: Come on, come on, there they go! Don’t let them get away.
[gunshots]
JANINE DE LUCA: Five, take down the door.
MAXINE MYERS: Whatever’s behind there, we’re ready.
[door breaks down]
SAM YAO: There’s a guard to your right.
[GUARD collapses]
MAXINE MYERS: [imitates CAMEO WOOD] Taken care of.
SAM YAO: And two coming for you, Five.
[GUARDS collapse]
MAXINE MYERS: [imitates JODY MARSH] Got them.
SAM YAO: Okay. Well then, um, uh… you’re into the central control room. Oh my God, you’re into the central control room! And according to these notes, the only person there is… huh. Ian Golightly. Sigrid’s plan is to leave him in charge of Abel in the event of an attack. You know, if I were planning this out as a campaign, I would not have him as the final boss.
JANINE DE LUCA: Oh, for goodness’ sake. After all we’ve been through? [clears throat] Mister Golightly, as you see, we have you surrounded. We are armed. You have no choice but to tell your forces to stand down if you want to leave here alive.
SAM YAO: [imitates IAN GOLIGHTLY] No, I won’t.
JANINE DE LUCA: Yes, you will.
SAM YAO: [imitates IAN GOLIGHTLY] No, I won’t! I’ve never been a brave man, Miss De Luca, and I’m afraid of what Sigrid would do to me if I let you take Abel.
JANINE DE LUCA: Yes, you will, because you’re not a brave man. The sight of guns pointed at you will terrify you. [SAM YAO starts to protest] Mister Yao, yes he will!
SAM YAO: Oh, well, I don’t know. I don’t think so. I’ve listened in to some chatter about what’s going down at Abel. I think he’s spineless, but not in a useful way.
MAXINE MYERS: It doesn’t matter what either of you think. What do we do if he does just refuse to stand the guards down?
JANINE DE LUCA: We’ll do what we always do. What I’ve learned from you all.
SAM YAO: What, run away?
JANINE DE LUCA: We’ll improvise. Come on, it’s time. We have a workable plan. A month away from our home is long enough. We’re ready to go.
SAM YAO: Are we?
JANINE DE LUCA: You heard the transmission as well as I did. Mister Sissay has delayed as long as he can. They’re flying Doctor Cohen and baby Sara out of Abel tomorrow morning. We have to go tonight.
Codex[]
Letter[]
Hey Five,
Just in case Janine was too distracted to tell you herself- you did a really, really great job today. I know I can't have been the only one who started to feel a little sick running through all of those drills, imagining what those bastards have done to our home, so I'm glad you were able to keep it together. Small victories, eh?
Don't worry, Five. We'll take our township back before you know it. This plan's going to work, I just know it. Sigrid and Ian have no idea what’s coming for them.
- Sam
Supplies[]
The following supplies can be found in this mission.
(List may be incomplete.)
Axe
Bandages
Baseball Bat
Batteries
Bedroll
Book
Bottled Water
Box of Lightbulbs
Candles
Cooking oil
Cricket bat
Disposable camera
Makeup
Mobile Phone
Overcoat
Pain Meds
Penknife
Pot plant
Prescription Pain Meds
Saucepan
Sewing Kit
Shorts
Solar Charger
Thermal underwear
Tool Box
Trousers
USB Key
Base Unlocks[]
The following objects unlock for your Base upon completing this mission.
Propaganda Centre
- Description: The Ministry's base of operations for putting out (mis)information about Janine, Sam, and anyone who's ever helped Abel. Ian Golightly can truly set his creativity free here.
- Cost: 50 supplies, 2 materials (level 1); 100 supplies, 3 materials (level 2); 200 supplies, 4 materials (level 3)
- Effect: Increases morale (level 1); increases defence (level 2); increases defence and morale (level 3).
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