"Round Robin" is the tenth mission of The Home Front.
Essential maintenance is taking Abel off air for a while, but there's still time for one last set of exercises and a few heartfelt messages.
Exercises[]
Cast[]
Scenes[]
Make it a good one
Sam worries that even if he tells himself that things are going to be okay, he can't know that for sure. But for now he knows that he is safe at Abel with Janine. And he knows that Jody is safe in the warehouse, and you, Five, are eating surprisingly good self-heating food in the camping store. Peter is safe in the cinema and Phil is in New Canton. Everyone's okay. But they're having to stop broadcasting for two or three weeks to do essential maintenance. This means it's the last workout together for a while. Better make the most of it!
Surprise!
Sam isn't sure why he feels so upset. It isn't as though everyone will be less safe while you can't hear each other. And you'll have so many things to talk about. The Abel vegetable patch is doing well. There are some beans that have grown from tiny seedlings to about a metre tall in two weeks. In honour of that, the first exercise is Forward Lunges, perfect for picking those beans. One minute of those! And after the next song, there'll be a bit of a surprise.
Live to regret it
Welcome to the first simultaneous broadcast from Abel personnel. Peter has Sam on Rofflenet telling him to stop asking if its working. Today you're going to hear from Peter, Janine, and Phil, and Sam has told them to do their signature moves. Peter's isn't fit for the public though so you'll have to make do with Rocky inspired Jabs! A minute of those. You can't punch the zombie virus, but Peter wishes he could. Sam has given him free reign over the next song. Keep punching, or try dancing during it.
Don't tell her that
Hello Citizens! Phil is here broadcasting from New Canton. Zoe is speaking to him and laughing over the radio. Phil thinks she must like being on the floor getting covered in cat hair. In honour of Zoe's position on the floor, you'll be doing Sit Ups! Be careful not to strain your back, and descend in a controlled manner. Keep doing these for one minute. Good job, but Phil feels tired just thinking about it. Zoe has promised that she's going to have rock solid abs by the time he sees her again. It's nice to think about all the things you'll have to talk about when you're back together again. Phil thinks he'll know how much he misses Zoe when she isn't there, but don't tell her that! Try some more Sit Ups or dance during the music!
Together
Janine had intended to use her segment to explain in detail the maintenance work that will be taking them off air. However Sam persuaded her to say something a bit more heartfelt - She is proud of you all. No-one was prepared for this a few weeks ago, but everyone has risen to the challenge with courage and grace and you should be proud of yourself. For Janine's exercise, you will be doing Wall Sits! Rest your lower back against the wall, then bend your knees as though sitting down. Then hold that position for one minute! Janine thinks it is a perfect metaphor for the current situation - it's simple but not easy, but by doing it we get stronger. Janine knows we will come through this together. Now for a song from Janine's personal motivational collection!
We'll be back soon
Sam has been doing those exercises too, and is wiped out. Good job for keeping up with them, Five! He swears that his bean plants get bigger every time he looks at them. Life is irrepressible. The zombie virus didn't stop it, and neither will comms maintenance. We're all reaching out for connection, and we don't know when we'll get it, but one day soon there'll be something solid to grasp onto. He doesn't want to click the button to end the broadcast, so he's going to sit here for a while and remind himself that you're all still there. We'll be back soon.
Transcript[]
SAM YAO: You know how sometimes you want to say that things are going to be okay, but you can’t definitely know that they’re okay, and they’re not really okay right now? Yeah. All right. So Janine would say, “We have no evidence, Mr. Yao, that things are going to get any less okay than they are at the moment.” Sometimes she can be weirdly comforting.
Anyway, all right. Positives: I’m safe in Abel Township with Janine. The other runners are safe. Jody is still in the warehouse. Runner Five is in the Spectrum Mall eating through the climbing shop stash of self-heating meals. Apparently, the lentil pilaf is surprisingly all right. Peter’s in the cinema. Phil’s in New Canton. We’re all okay right where we are. But there’s… [sighs] Look, something’s happening to the communications system and we’re gonna stop broadcasting for two or three weeks. We are 100% definitely coming back, okay?
Janine explained this to me. Um, yeah, hang on. [paper rustles] Yeah, “Essential maintenance can no longer be put off if our comms systems are to weather this time robustly.” Okay, I guess that was less technical than I was expecting. Anyway, this is our last exercise together for a little while, so I guess let’s make it a good one. I’m gonna play the best dancing song ever. Let’s dance.
SAM YAO: I don’t know why I’m feeling so upset about this, really. It’s not like anyone’s going to be less safe when we can’t hear each other’s voices, and we’ll all have crazy stories to tell when we come back. I bet Peter will have like, trained the fox to do tricks, and Five will know crazy amounts about mountaineering from all those climbing books.
And honestly, the Abel vegetable patch is just bursting with life right now. There were these borlotti bean plants and I’m not kidding, they were tiny beans two weeks ago and now they’re literally a meter tall, stretching up to the sky. I mean, who knows what they’ll have done by the time we start broadcasting again? Maybe I’ll have quite the adventure to report with a giant and a golden goose.
Anyway, first exercise. In honor of the Abel veg patch, forward lunges! When the beanstalks are covered in new fresh beans, this will be the move we’ll do to reach the furthest away ones. Okay? So you know the drill. Stand with your feet hip-width apart, take a big step forward with your right foot, then lower your hips towards the ground, bending both knees, keeping your right shin vertical and let your left heel come off the floor as your left knee lowers towards the floor. Make sure your right knee doesn’t go over your right toes. Go as far down as you can, but make sure it doesn’t hurt. Then push down into your right heel to go back to the starting position, then do it again!
Okay, I’m gonna time you. 30 seconds. Right leg forward, and go. That’s it, keep it going. Just think of all those lovely beans you’ll pick like this. It makes it all worth it, really. I love beans. Okay, now change legs. Left leg at the front, go at your own pace. Your 30 seconds starts now. Hmm, maybe I should do some more beans. One day, we’ll all be doing this in the veg patch in unison and it’ll look really weird. Bean training, that’s what I’m going to call this. Almost there… and that’s 30 seconds! Good work, everyone. I’m gonna play some more music. You could either do more lunges, or dance, or rest, and when you come back, there’ll be a surprise! [laughs] Bet you can’t wait, can you?
PETER LYNNE: Okay, let me see. God, is that… Is it working? [gasps, then laughs] Oh my God, I have a red light. Majestic. Oh, and I’ve got Sam on ROFFLEnet telling me to stop asking if it’s working, so I… I’ll assume it must be working. Um… Oh, uh, hi. Hello. Uh, welcome to a simultaneous broadcast from the Abel Township personnel for the first time, uh, well, ever. And-and the last time, just for a few weeks, so I suppose we’d better make it good.
Today you’ll be hearing from myself, Phil, and Janine. Sam said we should all do our "signature moves". Now of course, as you all know, my signature move is absolutely unfit for public consumption, certainly pre-watershed, so I’m going to have to come up with something else. Tell you what, having us all chip in though, it really does start to feel like having a real conversation. Which let me tell you, when you’ve exclusively been chatting with a fox for several weeks, that’s really quite a thrill. So to celebrate, let’s do some of our Rocky-inspired moves together one more time. That’s right, it’s the jabs!
So hold your fists in front of you. Your dominant hand - and that’s, of course, the hand you write with - should be a little further from your face, ready to punch. Plant your feet diagonally, shoulder-width apart, with your knees slightly bent and your dominant foot at the back. Now you’re going to punch out with your dominant hand, rotating your arms so that your knuckles face up and your shoulder moves forwards. We’re going to do 30 seconds of jabs just like that.
Starting… don’t be [?]… now. Yes, get going. Excellent. Don’t get carried away. It’s a marathon, not a sprint. 15 seconds down. Once again, imagine hitting that bullseye dead center. Just how, you know, in Disney’s Robin Hood where he gets the arrow in and then hits the arrow with the arrow? Uh, anyway, uh, change foot. Now you want to put your dominant foot forward. That’s of course the one you write with. And punch with your other arm. Excellent. Oh, this form, it’s delicious. I could eat you up. 15 seconds left. Don’t start to tire. Feel the burn, embrace the burn, love the burn! And we’re done.
God, it feels good every time, doesn’t it? I know we can’t punch the zombie virus in the face, but for what it’s worth, I’d for one bloody want to. All right. Well, Sam’s made the frankly laughable mistake of giving me free choice of what music comes up next, so I’m going to make him regret that. Here is the song that I will be listening to over the next few weeks. Keep on punching while it plays, or just throw some shapes instead.
PHIL CHEESEMAN: [laughs] He started it by saying, “Is this working?” [laughs] No, but of course, he’s not a radio professional. How would he know that when the red light goes on, it means it’s… Oh. Um… okay! Hello, ci-ti-zens! Phil Cheeseman here, broadcasting from New Canton Radio, bringing you all the exercises and the hits all day long. Zoe is literally laughing in my ear right now. Okay, Zoe, could you try to… Yeah, I mean, you don’t have to tell me that you’re literally rolling around on the floor. Aren’t you getting covered in cat hair? Honestly, I think she actively likes being covered in cat hair. It attracts all the cats while keeping the humans away. Ideal.
All right. In honor of Zoe’s position on the floor, we’re going to do sit-ups. Lie down on your back on the floor. Get something soft like a towel or a yoga mat. Bend your knees and put your feet flat on the floor. Now remember that you have a few options, but whichever you choose, make sure you don’t strain your back. Keep your abs engaged and use them to lift your body. If you can only move an inch off the ground, well, that’s plenty to work your core.
Okay, so. Option one, start with your arms behind you so that the backs of your hands are resting on the floor, then sit up so that your hands tap the ground on either side of your feet or your knees. Option two is more like, uh, crunches and they’re more protective of your lower back. Start with your fingertips of your hands behind each ear with abs engaged. Sit up until your head is a few inches off the ground, and then lower your upper body back to your starting position in a controlled motion. Don’t just flop down.
Okay, we’re going to do 60 seconds of as many sit-ups or crunches as we can. Start… now! Just imagine how much cat hair Zoe gets on her doing this exercise. Halfway through. Uh, remember, only sit up as far as you can without overstraining yourself. 15 seconds left, you’ve got this! There we go! Oh, my stomach feels sore just thinking about all that work you’ve done.
Zoe reckons that by the time I see her again, she’s going to have rock hard abs. [laughs] I reckon I’m never going to get close enough to her to find out because of the intense hair ball situation. I guess that’s a nice thing for us all to think about, what we’ll be able to do or tell each other about when… yeah, we do see each other again. Will we have perfected one joke or learned to play the spoons or will we have stories to tell about where we were and how it was for us? I guess Sam will have borlotti beans to share. Peter will have extensive Rocky knowledge. And me… I think I’ll just know how much I miss Zoe when she’s not around. [sighs] But don’t tell her that. Here’s some music. You could do some more sit-ups or crunches, or express yourself with your best dance moves.
JANINE DE LUCA: Hello, listeners. The red light tells me I’m now broadcasting, and it is an honor to do so. My intention was to use this segment to explain in some detail the maintenance work we are undertaking on the communications system to educate listeners on electrical engineering in a crisis situation, but Mr. Yao expressed the view that something a little more heartfelt might be more appropriate.
I am proud of you all. None of us expected to be separated for this long. None of us were prepared for it a few short weeks ago, and yet we have all risen to the challenge with courage and grace. We have grown crops, we have exercised, we have cared for those near to us, we have reached out to those far away. When we felt we could not carry on, we have carried on. I am proud of us. Please take this time to recall things that you are proud of in your own behavior in this time. I am proud of you for those things, too.
And with that said, on to my signature move. I gave this some thought, drew up a shortlist, and analyzed each exercise for signature potential. In the end, I decided upon the wall sit. It is simple, but surprisingly taxing. Rest your lower back against a wall and bend your knees as if you were sitting down, then simply hold that position for 60 seconds. Begin now.
That’s it. Excellent, runners. Keep going. 15 seconds. You may feel a burning sensation in your thighs. There we have it. Keep it up, runners. 30 seconds. Try to maintain the position, but you may stand up and then resume the wall sit if you need. 15 seconds to go. You will get through this. Keep it going, runners. That’s it. Stand up.
It occurred to me that the wall sit is the perfect analogy for our times. What needs to be done is simple, but not easy. The longer it goes on, the more tired we become, and yet, through doing this simple maneuver, we will grow stronger. I know this to be true. I will now play a song which gives me fortitude in difficult times. You may use the time to complete more wall sits, to march in place, or to dance. We will come through this together. We never knew our own strength until now. I will speak to you soon. For now, here is a tune from my personal motivational collection. Continue with wall sits or move in whatever way feels best to you.
SAM YAO: Well bloody hell, I’ve been doing those exercises along with you and that was a tough workout! Well done, everyone. God, honestly, I swear my borlotti bean plants are growing every time I look away. Like, there’s this one plant, right? It’s grown right up past the top of the cane and now it’s sort of waving around in midair, looking for something new to cling onto. Yeah… yeah. I know how it feels. All that from one tiny bean. Huh. Do you know what? Life is just irrepressible. There’s-there’s no stopping it. Not the zombie virus. Certainly not a little break in comms. It’s like, bursting out everywhere, little tendrils reaching out for connection. It’s unstoppable, and we’re part of it, too.
You know, when I finish this broadcast, I’m gonna walk out into the veg patch and put up some new nets, help the beans to grow up big and strong. The plant doesn’t know that yet, but it’s not going to have to wait very long, and that’s like us, too. Reaching out for connection, not knowing how long we’re gonna have to wait, but one day, this won’t be going on anymore. All we have to do is keep on reaching out and one day soon, there’ll be something solid for us to cling on to.
[laughs] I, uh… yeah, I’m supposed to be the one to click the off button here to end the broadcast, but I don’t want to. [laughs] But um, I’m just going to close my eyes and tell myself, even though I can’t see you, you’re all still there. All of us are reaching out one way or another. We’re all still here even after the click. I’m just being silly. We’ll be back soon.
[radio off button clicks]
Codex[]
Letter[]
Hi Five!
So, we're still not exactly sure when we'll be able to broadcast again, but in the event that it does end up taking longer than a couple of weeks, I just wanted to send you a note to say, well... thank you.
I feel like I say this all time, but I really do appreciate having you along for these workout sessions. As stressful as things have been lately, it always makes me feel better to know that you're out there somewhere on the other end of the line, and that I'm not just shouting into the void, you know? It seems silly now, but I think when we were first starting to hunker down, I was genuinely a bit surprised at how much I missed just... getting to see people in person, especially given how much time I spend cooped up in the comms shack on my own. But having you tune in the past few weeks, it's made things a lot more bearable. Fingers crossed it's made things a little easier for you, too.
I promise I won't keep going on and on, but I really hope you know how glad I am - how glad we ALL are - that you're part of the team.
Stay safe, and look after yourself, Runner Five. You've got this.
Love,
Sam
Supplies[]
The following supplies can be found in this mission.
(List may be incomplete.)
Baseball Bat
Board game
Cricket bat
First Aid Kit
Flashlight
Laptop
Makeup
Mobile Phone
Overcoat
Pain Meds
Shirt
Sports Bra
Trainers
Underwear
Whisky
| Missions | |||
|---|---|---|---|
| Previous: We Are Not Alone | Next: Turn Your Radio On | ||